What a random night. Everyone was drunk.  I feel like so much has been going on lately in my life. Lots of energy buzzing around. I'm being productive and things have been less stressed.

Estherhaus, Silvertongue and I have agreed/decided to do a drag show this upcoming month, which is hilarious to think about, but I think we could win. And we'd win $$$. We know enough drunk queers to get shit riled up.

 

At the moment, I'm anxious because I am having company crash at my house who are traveling in for a print publishing workshop tomorrow. The printmaking guild (I'm the treasurer by default it seems. My professors and the president asked me if I wanted to take the position and I was like, ok word.  I can do this. I wanna have authority around this place!   If only they knew how little regard or care I feel towards money!)...  has invited 2 artist to let us pay them to come visit and let us print for them. Doing this, we get the experience of working with established printmakers and traveling students as master printmakers and get a sweet valuable print out of it. 

So I opened some of the rooms in the house for anyone needing resting grounds for the weekend. :)

Little wolf and I ended up going out last night. both picked up pretty girls. We were both nice on some wine when we got there.  Then Estherhaus and I ended up being alcoholics. Little wolf is underage and a little one, so she had to get it all in beforehand.

After the drag show,LW and I were by the dance floor and I saw these two sexy sexy ladies (or what was sexy sexy with my beer goggles. I haven't seen them sober, so we both might've been wrong, but I am pretty sure they were looking good) dancing on each other on the pedestal-stair-part-thing of the dance floor. I envisioned something even sexier when I thought about LW joining them. I kinda nudged the idea over to her which worked so she went after them and pulled me with her.

At first, it was LW making sure it would be cool if she joined and pointed to me and said some things and then the next thing I know, they are all over each other and grabbing me, so I end up dancing with them.

We switched partners, I guess. The next thing I know, the blonde girl was grinding and rubbing all over me- even getting all low and shit. The next thing I know, she's randomly kissing me, so I look over to LW and the same thing is going on over there.

Keep in mind we are on this pedestal thing... That's what I started to remember- when I realized my friends are looking at the situation from the crowd with odd, confused faces. I shrugged and we laughed. LW and the new girls were oblivious, so it was even more amusing. I realized how rather nice the situation actually was. Not because of the spectators- but since we had found two beautiful girls who wanted to play with us.

That's how it started at least. We ended up splitting off. I with the southern belle  blonde, LW- the brunette with the bob. The brunette was infactuated with LW, so I kinda did my own thing, meeting the blonde so I wouldn't feel creepy lurking around or waiting a turn or something awkward. I knew it was all ok anyway. When asked about our relationship status, LW told them, "we are not girlfriends, we are lovers".

Which feels so much more free to me, and actually makes me feel much closer and more exclusive towards her. I am actually pretty crazy about her at the moment, it's pretty gross. Autumn makes me feel romantic, what can I say?( Well, besides she is amazing for many reasons, but especially because she made me an elvis bandana from some fabric we found. She embroidered my name on it and did some stitching around the Elvises. )

ANYWAY, towards the end of the night, the crew decided we were ready to go smoke, so I invited the girls back with us to chill and they came. These girls were so random. They looked like they could be sorority girls. They must've been wasted. They were all over us- making out and pulling us around like we were theirs. 

Mine told me she is not out of the closet and still pretends to be straight in order not to humiliate her mother. She thinks she's gay but is afraid to pull out of the social expectations of the south. She has only sisters and described herself as "REALLY girly".  She was convinced I was something hott. I figured she came from somewhere waspy but was still glad about her enthusiasm. I played it cool and slid my hand in her back pocket and kissed back when she was kissing me. She and the brunette were friends from high school and go to the same university as us.

I was eyeing LW eyeing me while we both were kissing other girls. In the bathroom we agreed that it was just us at the end of the night and that we were both #1. The bathroom became our refuge for reporting back to each other about the others and it was sort of funny to us and made us want to ditch the other girls and be alone again. They actually seemed like they were really interested in spending the night and hooking up with us, but it was our first time doing that and since LW is still a little shaky on the us being lovers and not girlfriends thing.

I just want us to be honest and open individuals who deeply admire, appreciate and respect each other in all situations. Without expectations otherwise. I feel like "girlfriends" is too over-developed. I think social labels are sometimes too built up with less progressive ideas of what people should do or how they should be with each other or with others. I think there should be a more free definition. Girlfriends sounds almost jokingly to me these days, something like grade school identity. I feel like this is the most positive approach I've taken with someone who I hesitated with for so long due to heart trauma from my last love- cause we were straight up, crazy bitches.

LW is very thoughtful and understanding with the things I've been making her question. Things have been a lot of fun and really relax these days.